It’s 07.43 Sunday morning.
I’m only awake because the wind (outside!) woke me; blowing a gale, rain lashing against the windows.
And I needed a wee.
You know I was knackered yesterday afternoon?
Well today I’m still knackered.
I know going cross country schooling with Vin at Lincomb would have taken a lot out of me, but the hectic world that Soph and I inflict on ourselves added to the burden.
When she got in from work (by the way, have you read her brilliant rant about the twunts who go to the library?) she found me watching Back To The Future.
Not even ‘resting my eyes’, I was full-on out of it.
I even missed the immortal line “Make like a tree… get out of here”.
But then things really kicked in and we went in to full party mode.
I got on the phone to Pizza Hut and Soph sat on the couch, looked beautiful and alluring in a gorgeous, desirable way and blogged – because she didn’t want to rant at me
And the TV stayed on.
We have FreeView (Freeview? However it’s cased to appear) and that gives us 23 channels to choose from.
So in honour of those 23 channels we watched just one: ITV1 to be precise…
Animals Do The Funniest Things (I really watched just for the equine-related subjects. That’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it)
Celebrity Mr & Mrs (this programme is really really really is really really really shit. But it did the job while Pizza Hut-delivered products were received and consumed)
Britain’s Got Talent (car crash television for those who don’t want to think. And neither of us wanted to think last night) was followed by
Half of an episode of Pushing Daisies.
Because at around 21.30 I couldn’t cope any longer,.
I slurred (because of tiredness!) that I was going to bed and lurched my way upstairs – my mental and physical faculties already closing down around me, much like HAL’s processes closed down in 2001: A Space Odyssey.
I tried to read but couldn’t pick up Clarkson J.
Soph followed me upstairs and performed a strip-tease that was sexually arousing and comedic in almost equal measures.
I wonder if anyone has developed a funny girl striptease?Â
Then she went in to the bathroom to ablute and clean teeth and I can’t remember anything else.
I think I could have been in there and I blew it.
Or didn’t blew it.
And now it’s 08.00.
I’m going to finish what I’m doing, have a shower and a shave and clean my teeth and commit the wickedest of household sins…
Sneak back in to bed and cuddle up to my wife.