{"id":16302,"date":"2026-06-25T11:50:13","date_gmt":"2026-06-25T10:50:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/?p=16302"},"modified":"2026-06-25T11:50:15","modified_gmt":"2026-06-25T10:50:15","slug":"conspiracies","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/?p=16302","title":{"rendered":"Conspiracies"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

(I’ve stolen this from a non-fascist, non-lunatic branch of social media which is not <\/em>owned by any trillionaires, billionaires, or any one single person)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Conspiracy theories come in various categories. I was browsing a thread of low-key conspiracy theories and became amused, so I thought I’d share a few here for entertainment purposes. Ready?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

HD is basically what normal TV used to be, and normal TV has been deliberately downgraded<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Perfume and cosmetics testers in shops are better quality than the versions you’re actually sold<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Household white goods & boilers have an in built self-destruct timer activated by the installer that run beyond the warranty + a randomised number of months<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Carlsberg and Carling are exactly the same beer, but priced differently<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Walls ice cream was made to use up the excess fat from making their sausages<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Pothole repairs are always shoddy to ensure the guys repairing them can charge the council to repair them again in 12 months<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I am living with a low key curse that forces me to stand in queues longer than everyone else no matter which line I stand in<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Smartphones are all really listening all the time<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Non-stick pans. They are actually stickier than stick pans. And then the non-stick stuff starts falling off and you need to buy a new one<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There is a scene in The Wizard of Oz with a silhouette of someone committing suicide by hanging<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

The ground level letterbox with heavy springs was only invented because the letterbox designer\u2019s wife ran off with a postman and the designer wanted revenge<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Apple deliberately uses certain software updates to make older models obsolete and thereby sell more iPhones (well, it’s true of Microsoft and laptops)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There is no difference whatsoever between shampoo for greasy hair and shampoo for dry hair<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There is no “high volumes of calls” there is only understaffed contact centres and they’ve tries to normalise that with lies<\/p>\n\n\n\n

“Hello!” is a subversive magazine run by Marxists<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When you visit a speed test web site, your ISP knows and deliberately boosts your throughput far above your normal, pitiful speed, so their service seems better than it is<\/p>\n\n\n\n

People who pronounce scones as ‘scones’ should not be trusted<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Milton Keynes was built on a grid system because the planners who designed it weren’t very good at drawing curves. And, every time the planners put down a coffee cup on the maps it produced another roundabout<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

(I’ve stolen this from a non-fascist, non-lunatic branch of social media which is not owned by any trillionaires, billionaires, or any one single person) Conspiracy<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":13,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-16302","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-stuff","two-columns"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16302","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/13"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=16302"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16302\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":16304,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16302\/revisions\/16304"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=16302"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=16302"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=16302"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}