{"id":187,"date":"2007-09-11T12:31:19","date_gmt":"2007-09-11T11:31:19","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/?p=187"},"modified":"2012-05-04T22:31:11","modified_gmt":"2012-05-04T21:31:11","slug":"a-sleepy-conversation%e2%80%a6","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/?p=187","title":{"rendered":"A Sleepy Conversation…"},"content":{"rendered":"

the final lunchtime post of the day: a transcript of a conversation between a sleepy but very Lovely S as she drives an equally sleepy B home one evening last week… we pick up the conversation at the point where we’re talking about one of our favourite topics: chavs<\/em><\/p>\n

B: If we made it illegal for chavvy people to leave their homes they wouldn’t be able to go out anymore and then we wouldn’t have to see them.
\nS: Why would they listen to us?
\nB: Because we would be the law.
\nS: I am the law!
\nB: Like Judge Dredd.\u00c2\u00a0 And we could ride around on our special scooters and everything!
\nS: I’d like to make that stripey shirt illegal, it’s terrible.
\nB: Actually, that stripey shirt really is illegal.
\nS: (laughs) In some countries.
\nB: In this one! The Offences Against the Person Act 1947
\nS: (laughs) You’re so funny!
\nB: I’m being serious.
\nS: As soon as you add a date to something you think it validates it.
\nB: Of course it does!
\nS: No it isn’t. I’ve learned this. You do this even when it’s not true!
\nB: But it is true!<\/p>\n

Pause while S puts her eyes back in her head…<\/p>\n

S: Oh my! What, what did she have on?
\nB: (giggles)<\/p>\n

Pause<\/p>\n

B: It’s one minute past ten now and all of a sudden the pubs are full, but when we were in that one (he points as we drive past) – before we went to the second pub – it was empty. But the second pub was full when we got there yet when I went to the loo before we left it was empty too!
\nS: Ah, that’s because the locals go to the second pub first because it does such good food. Then they go to the first pub second so they can all get pissed.
\nB: I get the impression that having fooded themselves up in the second pub they all rolled away from their troughs with their little trotters in the air…
\nS: Like (sings) Spiderpig, Spiderpig, does whatever a Spiderpig does. (laughs)<\/p>\n

(there then followed a completely random conversation about Dudley Moore and the film Crazy People and how much The Lovely S loves the film. and then there’s a conversation about how far away Christmas is and then we go to birthdays)<\/em><\/p>\n

S: … your birthday. Is it the fourth?
\nB: Yeah, apparently.
\nS: I had your present sorted before my birthday!
\nB: Ahh, bless you. Is it a trip to the old people’s home?
\nS: (gasp!) You’ve been looking under the bed again, haven’t you?
\nB: I have. I found the big box with ‘Bren’s birthday’ written on it.
\nS: (laughs)
\nB: And inside…
\nS: (laughs again)
\nB: …inside is some rope…
\nS: (laughs) Some gaffer tape.
\nB: Yeah, gaffer tape. A porn dvd…
\nS: And?
\nB: A blindfold
\nS: Wow, sounds like a good night to me!
\nB: And a ticket to the old people’s home open day.
\nS: Yay!
\nB: But you are going to pleasure me first.
\nS: (laughs)
\nB: And when my defences are down…
\nS: (laughs again) I can’t deny it.
\nB: I’m sorry, I should stop poking around in little boxes.
\nS: Except mine.
\nB: You have a very nice little box, it must be said.
\nS: My jewellery box?
\nB: Ummm, no.
\n(both laugh)<\/p>\n

See?<\/p>\n

That’s the kind of crazy kids we are.<\/p>\n

Random conversations about all kinds of weird stuff. But don’t be fooled. We also do very deep, intensely serious conversations. Just not when we’re both dead tired.<\/p>\n

B<\/em><\/strong>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

the final lunchtime post of the day: a transcript of a conversation between a sleepy but very Lovely S as she drives an equally sleepy<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":13,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-187","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-stuff","two-columns"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/187","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/13"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=187"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/187\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=187"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=187"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=187"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}