{"id":3980,"date":"2010-11-01T21:09:53","date_gmt":"2010-11-01T21:09:53","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/?p=3980"},"modified":"2010-11-04T05:57:58","modified_gmt":"2010-11-04T05:57:58","slug":"by-the-beard-of-the-prophet","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/?p=3980","title":{"rendered":"By the beard of the prophet!"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

There may be swearage. Sorry. It’s not intentional. If some small part of swearage should slip out, it is wholly accidental and I apologise for it in advance. You know. On the off chance. Just in case.<\/em><\/p>\n

What the bloody hell is all this Halloween nonsense?<\/p>\n

When I was a child my siblings and I scared the living crap out of each other by, erm, being very scary and then we did apple bobbing. And then we went to bed and had a mostly sleepless night punctuated by howling nightmares.<\/p>\n

And it never did me any harm.<\/p>\n

These days we have little thugs trying to extract money\/goods through menace for up to two weeks before 31st October and we appear to tolerate it?<\/p>\n

Wake up, people!<\/p>\n

Also, there was some utter twonk on the television this morning (it was ITV so there were twonks aplenty) who described Halloween as – and I quote – ‘a holiday’.<\/p>\n

What?<\/p>\n

We get a paid day off for Halloween?<\/p>\n

When did that happen?<\/p>\n

Oh.<\/p>\n

It hasn’t happened has it?<\/p>\n

So that means…<\/p>\n

IT’S NOT A FUCKING HOLIDAY.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Speaking of twunts on the television.<\/p>\n

Earlier this evening I was unfortunate enough to catch a few minutes of something called ‘ITV At The Movies’.<\/p>\n

I’ll let the hideous title slip past my critical gaze for I have a larger target in the crosshairs.<\/p>\n

The few minutes of the show, billed as a ‘film review’ programme, that we did watch, didn’t consist of one atom of in-depth film critique.<\/p>\n

Instead, we were served with a sickeningly sycophantic portion of regurgitated PR puffery with a side order of some two-star arse kissing.<\/p>\n

But that’s not why I hurled the remote at the television.<\/p>\n

This is why I did…<\/p>\n

And please bear in mind this is ‘ITV At The Movies’, a film review show, OK?<\/p>\n

A member of staff of said show – the unfortunately named Lizzie Cunty<\/span> Cundy – was interviewing the Australia-born film director, screenwriter and producer, Mark Anthony ‘Baz’ Luhrmann.<\/p>\n

The topic was Luhrmann’s film ‘Moulin Rouge’ and Lizzie whatserface said, and I quote again, ‘When I watched the movie, there were so many scenes and so much action.’<\/p>\n

Because you wouldn’t ordinarily expect ‘so many scenes’ in a feature film, would you?<\/p>\n

*head-desk, head-desk, head-desk, head-desk*<\/p>\n

Anyway, in other news…<\/p>\n

I’ve been doing the video thing again.<\/p>\n

But this time I’m working on a cure to the noticeable ‘bleaching’ that has happened in the previous experiments.<\/p>\n

So I give you…<\/p>\n

This 47-second clip of how Sky satellite installers drive their vans on the A449 in Worcestershire on Sunday mornings:<\/p>\n

<\/embed><\/object><\/p>\n

And this 3m 8s clip of the drive from the top of Fish Hill down towards Broadway in Gloucestershire.<\/p>\n

Beautiful colours!<\/p>\n

But I hope you’ll see that I’m on to fixing the bleaching issue:<\/p>\n

<\/embed><\/object><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

There may be swearage. Sorry. It’s not intentional. If some small part of swearage should slip out, it is wholly accidental and I apologise for<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":13,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3980","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-stuff","two-columns"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3980","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/13"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3980"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3980\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3980"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3980"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3980"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}