That’s not a winge, simply a statement that at this moment in time my right arm aches to buggery and back.<\/p>\n
Ah, I’m glad you asked why.<\/p>\n
Her, down there (stands up and points 2-1\/2 islands down the office to short, bespectacled girl\/woman\/female with almost-shoulder-length hair), that’s why.<\/p>\n
She hit me.<\/p>\n
Repeatedly.<\/p>\n
Five or six times, if I’m honest.<\/p>\n
Because I was looking.<\/p>\n
Can we just get one thing straight here, before we go any further?<\/p>\n
I wasn’t touching.<\/p>\n
My tongue wasn’t hanging out.<\/p>\n
I wasn’t being conspicuous.<\/p>\n
I wasn’t even looking – really – more kind of… scanning.<\/p>\n
But she (and by ‘she’ I mean her sitting 2-1\/2 islands down the office) watches my eyes when we go up to Costa for our fix of caffeine.<\/p>\n
And because she watches my eyes she tracks where they are and where they’ve been and she guesses where they’re likely to go next based on her built-up mental database of clicks and pings.<\/p>\n
And then she hits me.<\/p>\n
I’m not doing anything wrong.<\/p>\n
We weren’t engaged in conversation – therefore I didn’t break eye contact or anything like that.<\/p>\n
We were just standing in the queue waiting to be served and I was just…<\/p>\n
Looking.<\/p>\n
Around me.<\/p>\n
That’s all.<\/p>\n
I mean, if my wife with standing beside me I’d be perving all over her!<\/p>\n
But she wasn’t.<\/p>\n
So I was just looking.<\/p>\n
And now I have a sore arm.<\/p>\n
Ouch.<\/p>\n
B<\/strong><\/em>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" That’s not a winge, simply a statement that at this moment in time my right arm aches to buggery and back. Ah, I’m glad you<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":13,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-425","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-stuff","two-columns"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/425","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/13"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=425"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/425\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=425"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=425"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brennigjones.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=425"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}