I have to write a thing.<\/p>\n
A very focussed, incisive business thing.<\/p>\n
It has to, briefly, summarise a complex situation, it must list the alternatives for improving a critical situation, it should explore the high-level pros and cons of the alternatives, and match the organisation’s strategy with the most appropriate solution.<\/p>\n
I like writing this kind of thing.<\/p>\n
Constructing and then putting a well-written, soundly-argued piece of logically-driven writing in front of the highest level of a \u00a3 multi-billion organisation is to expose my writing, and the thinking behind it, to a readership of intensely critical thinkers.<\/p>\n
Normally I rise to the challenge.<\/p>\n
But today there is\u00a0a small problem.<\/p>\n
My brain won’t work.<\/p>\n
I’ve been staring at the first page for half an hour.<\/p>\n
There’s a title.<\/p>\n
And that’s it.<\/p>\n
The more I stare at the sheet, the more my brain refuses to cooperate.<\/p>\n
Which is why I’m writing this piece, obv.<\/p>\n
This is an attempt to kick-start my intelligence in to productivity.<\/p>\n
The weird thing is not that my brain seems to have evaporated overnight.<\/p>\n
No, the weird thing is what I see when I look at the (almost) blank piece of paper.<\/p>\n
The number ’43’.<\/p>\n
What?<\/p>\n
How can my eyes look at a blank sheet of paper, but my head chooses to register the number ’43’?<\/p>\n
I’ve been staring at this non-existent number (if you see what I mean) for the last half-hour, trying to get going.<\/p>\n
I’m still not hitting any kind of a ‘get going’ stride.<\/p>\n
In racing terms,\u00a0cantering swiftly out of the starting gate would be good, but right now\u00a0I’d settle for leaving the paddock at a stiff walk.<\/p>\n
*pauses for another stare at ’43’ which isn’t actually there*<\/p>\n
This isn’t writer’s block.<\/p>\n
This is an indication of something far more sinister.<\/p>\n
I believe that sometime during the night I was visited by aliens.<\/p>\n
They sneaked up to my slumbering form and, through some kind of telekinetic mind-meld thing, they extracted what little intelligence I had left.<\/p>\n
I am hoping that writing this will get at least one cylinder firing.<\/p>\n
But here’s something that I would like to give you.<\/p>\n
A present.<\/p>\n
If you have the Chrome browser, click on the link below (in Chrome, obviously) and watch the most awesome piece of design I can ever remember.<\/p>\n
The tune’s not too shabby – have Arcade Fire ever done something not worth listening to?<\/p>\n
But the accompanying video will knock your socks off<\/p>\n
Trust me.<\/p>\n