I woke up, this morning, in a strange Mancunian bed.<\/p>\n
It wasn’t a talking bed that said words in a strange, Mancunian way, or anything like that, it’s just a bed in a Manchester hotel.<\/p>\n
I have pulled out all the stops; this is possibly one of the most expensive hotels I’ve ever stayed in, but I did manage to knock \u00a385 off the list price, through Expedia.<\/p>\n
Yay!<\/p>\n
Speaking of discounts, I paid my Oxford parking ticket yesterday. It came to \u00a325 because I paid so quickly.<\/p>\n
It doesn’t seem so expensive if you say it very quickly.<\/p>\n
Twentyfivequid.<\/p>\n
See?<\/p>\n
And besides, twentyfivequid is absolutely nothing compared to the price of this place.<\/p>\n
I have a suite.<\/p>\n
See, I said I’d pulled out all the stops.<\/p>\n
I’m expecting delivery of my room-service breakfast, as I type this. I’m sitting, in a white fluffy bathrobe the size of Newport, at the desk in the ‘office’, wondering what else I can do for fun.<\/p>\n
The ‘media centre’ in the lounge looks like the control panel of an Airbus, but I mastered the off\/on\/off switches.<\/p>\n
Despite having (I’d guess) \u00a325,000 of media technology in there, there was still nothing on the TV last night.<\/p>\n
I didn’t do the porn thing, I was too tired last night.<\/p>\n
Anyway.<\/p>\n
Today will find me at the BBC\/ITV\/C4 Comedy Writers Conference in Salford.<\/p>\n
Looking at the itinerary\/agenda, it seems the day will be full of seriousness and lacking laughs.<\/p>\n
I’m a little disappointed.<\/p>\n
Ah, there’s a knock at the door!<\/p>\n
Breakfast has arrived.<\/p>\n
Laterz.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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