Blogathon 15/22: Incredible journey (not)

Unlike the morning or afternoon excursions, our evening dog walk is just a quick turn around this part of the village. It’s about 2,600 steps, give or take, and we always go in the dark, just before bed, so we can stargaze Usually the walk is comprised of two humans and the spanners, but sometimes it’s just me and the dogs.

Robyn always tries to smuggle a tennis ball out, through the cunning expedient of hiding it in her mouth. The reason for the smuggling attempt will become clear shortly.

Yesterday evening it was the four of us. Yesterday evening she successfully smuggled out a tennis ball. To be fair, we noticed before we had gone far, but we were out, so we let her continue carrying it.

It’s about here that I should mention that (unusually) we were incorrectly dressed. I was wearing a fetching combination outfit – wellies, PJ trousers, t-shirt, waterproof jacket, and a baseball cap. Modesty prevents me from detailing what the other human was wearing.

Anyway, back with the walking part of the story. We got about a third of the way round when I noticed the ball had disappeared from Robyn’s mouth. It seemed likely she’d put it down not too far from the house, so we decided to complete the walk, and then push on for the 30-40m we reckoned it would take us to find the ball.

After about another 100m, Chewie decided that somebody’s really expensive but unfenced artificial lawn was the perfect platform to receive a really squitty liquipoo. His liquipoos are epic, and yesterday evening’s was no exception!

Being responsible poo bag-carrying people, my good lady wife her indoors held the torch while I gathered up as much as I could, as well as I could. But the thing with liquipoos is they are about 95%… Liquid.

We humans held a quick team meeting and decided we’d be good nearish neighbours, we’d go home, pick up some water (in a container, obviously) and after retrieving the tennis ball from wherever it was, we would carry on to the scene of the liquipoo and do a better job of clearing up.

However, a further 40m on, Chewie decided he’d done so well back there, he should treat his adoring public to a repeat performance. Liquipoo 2.0.

Again, we cleaned up as best we could, then completed the loop and got home. After a minute or two we two humans and the two dogs set out on the repeat journey. Except with a watering can, full to the brim.

Robyn retrieved the tennis ball from about where we thought it would be. We were just about approaching the scene of the first liquipoo when we noticed that our little walking bus had picked up an extra passenger. Ripley Cat was strolling along behind, looking all nonchalant, as if going for a walk with two humans and two dogs was something she did most evenings.

At the scene of the first liquipoo, water dispersed and removed the devastation. As we approached the location of liquipoo 2.0, a person came out of a house opposite, got into a car, started it up and put the headlights on. And didn’t drive off. Did not.

For reasons not entirely clear to me this morning, I was discouraged from continuing with Operation Clean-up, so we loitered, in the glare of the headlights. And that’s why the parish magazine might carry an article about two incorrectly-dressed humans, two spaniels, a cat, and a watering can in this corner of the village, in the dark of night.

Eventually the car drove off, we then completed the clean-up of liquipoo 2.0, and then two oddly-attired humans and two spaniels turned around and walked back home. In the dark. With the watering can. And with Ripley Cat following.