I don’t know about you, or even whether you have these thoughts, but it’s the everyday stuff that filters through my mind.
I think about the routines.
And I think ‘What will happen if I’m not here?’
Who will do the things that I do?
Who will cover for me at work?
Who will put the bins out on a Wednesday?
Who will do the washing up?
Who will deliberately be the focus of occasional jokes, for the emotional betterment of friends, colleagues, loved ones?
Who will fill the gap in the lives of these friends, colleagues, loved ones – a gap that should be filled with mirth, and infrequent faux rage?
And it isn’t so much the ‘who?’; it’s the ‘what happens if nobody else does these things?’
A guy I know died on Saturday.
He was much younger than me.
He leaves behind two small children, and their grieving mother.
And I wonder how they’re dealing with the crushing grief that I know they must be living through.
I hope they’re going to come out of this without permanent damage.
I wish I could help, but I don’t know them.
So I think about some of the things that he did.
And I wonder how they are coping with the gaps.
I think we all have these thoughts, occasionally.
Sorry to hear of this sad event. Sudden loss is always difficult, but moreso when youngsters also have to cope with it.
But people do cope… in the main.
It just takes time.
I know what you mean. We just lost a 29 year old son of our best friends. It is so difficult to know how to help. It does make one ponder one’s own mortality as well.