You are Here
Stuff

Even more grump going on

I’ve just twittered and feel so unsatisfied by it I feel compelled to ellaborate.

The tweet was:

“Really really f*ck*ng grumpy. Totally f*ck*ng got the grumps. B*st*rds. C*nts. F*ck*ng tw*ts. Don’t laugh at me. I’m grumpy.”

Now, people who know me are, right now, leaping to their feet to defend me. Or defend my character, would be more correct.

You are not, they’re shouting with one voice, a grump.

Listen hard enough and you can hear them.

Hark!

Hear them?

Me too.

But for some fucking reason this evening I am really really fucking grumpy.

Not even the sight of the sainted Sadra Bullock on television is lifting me mood.

Sandra Bullock, that is. Not Sadra. Her lesser-well-known cousin.

But the point of this ramble is to underline that ‘grump’ is neither my default mode nor my most common mode.

I’ve been reviewing unpublished blog posts. Does anyone else do that? Keep unpublished articles until the time is right to release them upon the world?

They underline my point again.

There’s the very humorous: Bang Bang You’re Dead.

The side-splittingly funny: Ten Tell-Tale Signs That Your Loved One Is A Mentalist

The slightly maniacally hilarious: Tomorrow We’re Taking A Train

A Trip In The Life Of An Oxford Tube Veteran is so funny that it’s been nominated for an award. By me.

Horses, Courses And Other Obstacles In Life made me laugh so much a little bit of wee came out. And I wrote it!

And the yet-to-be-published Extreme Black Cabbing is so funny that Word chuckles to itself everytime I load it.

That’s my point.

I’m a funny guy.

Funny guy is my default mode.

It really is!

Just not now.

Not tonight.

Except listening to Jonathon Woss pronounce ‘Wufuss Wainwight’ did lift my mood a little.

But for the most part tonight, ladies and gentlemen, tonight I am a fucking grump.

You have been warned.

Why is there never a Jehovah’s Witness knocking on the door when you want one?

I want a really good fight.

Yes I know it’s 1am, that’s not my fault.

I’m grumpy.

11 thoughts on “Even more grump going on”

  1. If I was to point out that it’s “… your loved one is a mentalist”, would you laugh at my pedantry or would that make you even grumpier?

  2. When that happens to me, which it has several times recently, I consider it a “Great Blue Funk” and try to get on with it.

    Hopefully you’ve woken to a better mood today.

  3. You see how good I am to you Masher? I could go back and edit that post and then your comment would look like a big cardigan-wearing jessie, stuck out there all alone in its wrongness. But no. I’m going to leave my little angry/grumpy typo alone so that it balances your comment in all its majestic glory. That’s how good I am. In fact I go beyond good. I move to excellent. So there. 🙂

    S. Le, thanks.

  4. It wasn’t your neighbors. It was me. I just happen to use very potent pyrotechnics. Feel free to reciprocate on 05 NOV.

  5. I thank you.

    I was hoping you might have cheered up by now, but I can see from your avatar that you still have a long face.

  6. A horse walks in to a bar, the barman said why the long face? And the horse said ‘Fuck off arsehole, I’ll have a pint of bitter’. They’re like that, horses. 🙂

    I’m fine thanks Masher. My episode of Rage Against The Machine has turned in to a comfortable dinner-jacket of Lounge Against The Machine proportions now.

    Have a good one.

  7. I was like this the other night. Actually it was the same night as i watched Sandra B on Ross also. THe grump for me was raging hormones. I was so pissed off, angry and grumpy for not much reason at all other than the fact that i am pregnant. lol.
    My hubby came outside to sit with me and started rambling on about some such crap and i just had to say “i am really trying to keep it together here. Pls shut up”.
    It passed after i went to bed but i was sure that if i didnt poke someone in the eye it would never of gone.
    PS) you write really well and if i am not over stepping the mark a little – your a funny guy. lol

  8. I had an attack of the grumps on Saturday afternoon, which I unfortunately took out on Bren. In front of people. Then we slept. And it seems my grump-attack jumped from me into him, because I woke up thinking ‘Thank God that hormonal shit has passed’ only to find poor Bren grumpy and angry and restless and ranting to the world.

    Whoops.

    xxx

  9. My mother always tells Jehova’s Witnesses that she “can’t talk to them right now” because she feels faint. She says she needs to go lie down quickly, must be from donating blood that afternoon…

  10. Ring Barclays. That’s always good for venting your anger, so good in fact that I’m amazed I haven’t been barred from calling them. Jehovah’s Witnesses are great, my dad used to specialise in getting rid of them in interesting ways such as informing them that he worshipped Satan or that he couldn’t talk right now because if he stayed at the door too long there was a danger that the gimp in the basement may asphyxiate. They usually left at a run. Not however as fast as the unfortunate Betterware man who happened to call just as Bury FC lost a crucial match.

Comments are closed.